Ding! You are now free to get your fat ass off this plane.

Kevin Smith, director of Mallrats, Clerks, Chasing Amy and similar films, was told to take a hike from a Southwest Airlines flight for apparently being obese.

"You [messed] with the wrong sedentary processed-foods eater!" Smith, whose next film, Cop Out, comes out February 26, posted in an epic Twitter rant.

That was one of many Tweets (many not G-rated) fired off recounting the 39-year-old actor/director's expulsion Saturday from an Oa...